Just Because You Could Doesn’t Mean You Should

So, let me tell you about this purse. I am not a designer-label gal. If it’s cute and functional, that’s my love language. Same with shoes — I’m all about cute and comfortable.

Well, this purse checked the cute box. It’s this rich magenta color, totally on-brand with what I wear when I speak. Gorgeous. But functionality? That’s where things went south.

See, it was more spacious than purses I’d had in a while. Which sounds great, right? More room for all the essentials. Except “essentials” apparently included: a second lipstick, plus three backups — just in case. A compact. A notepad, because apparently my phone wasn’t enough. Seventeen pens and three highlighters — because you never know when a spontaneous board meeting might break out in aisle 9 at Target. My daily prayer book. Earbuds. Hairspray, a toy for my grandbaby. Keys to everything I’ve ever owned. And oh, a business card holder with 25 cards. Why? Why? Why? Why? I honestly can’t remember the last time I used a business card.

By the time I got done loading that purse, it weighed more than a toddler. And just like a toddler, it was going to wear me out.

And here’s the thing — I’ve been talking with a lot of women leaders lately, and you know what? They sound just like that magenta purse. Beautiful. Impressive. Full of potential. 

But here’s what I’ve learned: effectiveness doesn’t always come from adding more. Sometimes it comes from subtracting.

And that’s when it hit me: just because you could doesn’t mean you should.

So, let me give you three quick ways to lighten your load — your “purse dump” for life and leadership:

1. Do the Purse Dump Test.
   Once a week, dump out your “schedule purse.” Ask yourself: what am I carrying that doesn’t belong anymore? What did I say yes to that I could actually release? (Because trust me, those seventeen pens were not a sign of preparation — they were a sign I couldn’t say no.) 
2. Ask the Magic Question: Could vs. Should.
   Before you say yes, pause and ask: “Just because I could do this… should I?” You’re capable of a lot — that’s not the question. The question is whether it’s the best use of your time, energy, and talent.
3. Stop Packing for Problems That Haven’t Happened Yet.
   I realized I was carrying around extra lipsticks, extra pens, extra everything — all “just in case.” And don’t we do the same thing with our thoughts? We stuff our mental purses with worries about what might happen. What if this deal falls through? What if I don’t get it right? What if, what if, what if…?
   Here’s the thing: carrying around “just in case” worries only weighs you down. Action step: when you catch yourself spinning on a future “what if,” stop and ask: Is this happening right now? If not, set it down. Don’t carry tomorrow’s maybe into today’s purse.
4. Leave Some White Space.
   Just like I had to leave room in my purse so I could actually find my keys when I needed them, you’ve got to leave room in your schedule so you can actually find yourself.

Carrying everything ‘just in case’ doesn’t make you more prepared. It just makes you more exhausted.

If this hit home for you, let’s keep the conversation going. You can find me at JenniferLedet.com.

Until next time, remember to live and lead by choice, not by chance!

Through facilitated leadership team retreats, customized training programs, coaching, and keynote presentations with a hint of Cajun flavor, Jennifer Ledet, CSP,  provides leaders with tools to help them be more intentional and live and lead by choice, not by chance.

Photo by Анастасия