If you are wondering why on earth I have featured a photo of a dying plant, my daughter calls it “The most dramatic plant ever,” because it was watered just yesterday. Could we be *cough cough* a little dramatic at times?

In my experience, “I’m so overwhelmed!” is a dangerous thing to say or think.  Now, maybe you’re not saying overwhelmed, but you’re saying something like “I’m so exhausted,” or “I’m burnt out,” or even something like “I don’t even know where to start!”

Thoughts and statements like these carry weight and pull you down.

And if you’re a leader saying these things to your team it will absolutely weigh them down too.

Consider how you feel when you say or think “I’m overwhelmed.” For me it conjures up feelings of:

• Defeat
• Hopelessness
• I’ll never catch up
• I’m not enough
• I will never have enough time
• I’m always behind

Now let’s take it one step further. Thinking the thought “I’m so overwhelmed,” and then conjuring up the feelings listed above (and more!), what actions are you likely to take?

Again, I can only speak for myself, but if I’m feeling the feels listed above, I’ll probably go to the kitchen and find any and every kind of unhealthy snack to stuff into my face. I will procrastinate in taking any action whatsoever in relation to my work projects, because my attitude will be “Why bother? I’m so behind already, it won’t make a difference.”

At night I’ll binge-watch Netflix and drink wine to soothe my growing mountain of stress. And I’ll probably not set the alarm and get to the gym early because I don’t feeeeel like it, (surely nothing to do with the aforementioned wine, right?). No doubt I’ll gain weight, feel craptacular, all of which will lead to more feelings of defeat, low self-esteem, and hopelessness.

I’m exhausted just talking about this.

And that’s the point.

Would someone please, for the love of all that is holy, tell me how saying “I’m so overwhelmed!” is serving you?

So, you’ve got a lot on your plate. You’re keeping a lot of balls in the air. I get it.

But could you find a thought or phrase that could better serve you?

I think you can.

As you can see in the scenario above, your thoughts generate your feelings and emotions, which lead to your actions, which create your results.

What if you were to CHOOSE to think a different thought?

I’m not talking about living in denial or being delusional.

But what I am talking about is taking a proactive approach.

Spending some time looking ahead and doing some planning can help you to create clarity. Ahhh. Clarity. That’s a nice thought.

Clarity trumps overwhelm. When you’re clear about where you’re headed and what your priorities are it makes it easier to focus, to keep your team on track, and to see the things that you need to stop doing altogether.

When you start to feel overwhelmed with so much to do, the first thing you need to do is to stop. (Yes, I know it’s counterintuitive, but stay with me.)

Here, I’ve got just a couple questions that will help you to achieve this clarity. (Fun fact: A client once called me the Self-Reflective Question Queen.)

Looking at the next quarter, ask yourself:

• What’s important now – in this “season?” (I think it’s critical to consider all areas of your life since one area spills over into every other area.)
• What are my TOP 3 GOALS for this next quarter?
• Next, do a brain dump of all the things that have to happen for you to achieve your goals. Basically, what you’re doing is reverse engineering your goals.
• Now, break out your calendar and start scheduling those activities and tasks.

Personally, I use my calendar like a Swiss Army Knife.

I schedule blocks of time for following up with clients, creating presentations, planning team retreats, and writing content (like this newsletter). This is the only way I know to make sure I get the important stuff done.

Stephen Covey said,

“The key is not to prioritize your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.”

And I couldn’t agree more.

As a leader, this is a phenomenal exercise to go through with your team. Help your team to get in the habit of planning and being proactive so that no one is pulling down the team with overwhelm, and everyone is pulling their own weight.

Now, when you start to feel your head spinning and you feel exhaustion creeping in, you can conjure up a thought or a statement like

“I am calm and confident that I will get the important things done.”

Trust me, as a Recovering Hot Mess, I know that words matter. Choose yours wisely.

PS. If you’re a senior woman leader and you’re feeling the stress of trying to manage the demands of a high-pressure leadership role, please join me for my FREE roundtable discussion, “Overwhelmed and Over It: Practical Strategies for Transforming Chaos into Calm.” For more details and to register, Click Here.

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Jennifer Ledet, CSP, is a leadership consultant and professional speaker (with a hint of Cajun flavor) who equips leaders from the boardroom to the mailroom to improve employee engagement, teamwork, and communication.  In her customized programs, leadership retreats, keynote presentations, and breakout sessions, she cuts through the BS and talks through the tough stuff to solve your people problems.