Growing up as the youngest of seven, hand-me-downs were a fact of life. Turns out I also inherited some hand-me-down leadership advice — well-meaning, like the clothes, but just a smidge outdated. I call them leadership myths.
If you’ve ever felt stretched thin, burned out, or secretly wondered if you’re doing this whole leadership thing “right,” you might recognize a few of them.
Let’s bust a few, shall we?
Myth #1: Leaders Have All the Answers
This one’s the classic. It creeps up on you — that belief that leaders are supposed to know everything. One day you’re just doing your job; the next, your shoulders are up around your ears while you pretend you’ve got it all figured out.
But let’s be real: that belief is exhausting. And spoiler alert — it’s not leadership. It’s martyrdom with a laptop.
Real leadership isn’t about knowing everything — it’s about creating space for others to think, contribute, and learn. When you stop being the answer machine, you start being the conversation starter.
Ask yourself:
• Do I listen to understand, or to respond?
• What would happen if I said, “That’s a great question — what do you think?”
Action step:
Lead with curiosity. Ask one question before giving an answer.
Myth #2: If You Want It Done Right, Do It Yourself
Ah yes, the myth that fuels your one-person circus act. You’re spinning plates, juggling torches, and balancing on a tightrope — all while pretending you’ve totally got this.
I hear it all the time from leaders I coach:
“I just don’t trust anyone else to do it right.”
“By the time I explain it, I could’ve done it myself.”
“My team’s already stretched thin — I don’t want to dump more on them.”
Sound familiar? Uh huh. I see you.
Here’s the reframe: Delegating isn’t dumping — it’s developing.
When you hand off a project, you’re not shirking responsibility; you’re sharing it. You’re giving someone else a chance to stretch, to learn, to build confidence. And you’re building trust — on both sides. Remember, everyone wants to feel like they’re contributing.
I’m guilty of this one, too.
After Hurricane Ida hit south Louisiana, we lost our summer home in Grand Isle. The structure was still standing, but it had to be completely gutted. As my husband and I sorted through the wreckage, some friends offered to help us haul out what could be salvaged.
My husband said “Yes, thank you!”.
I said — in my infinite “wisdom” — “No thanks, we’ve got it.”
(Pretty sure I sounded like my two-year-old grandson Nathan insisting, “I do it myself!”)
Y’all, we did not “got this.” It was way too much for us to handle alone. Thankfully, my husband ignored me and accepted their help. Our friends showed up, rolled up their sleeves, and helped us save what we could before mold took over.
That experience reminded me: leadership — and life — aren’t solo sports. Asking for help doesn’t make you weak; it makes you wise. And the same goes for delegating — it’s not dumping, it’s developing.
Ask yourself:
• What’s one task I’m holding onto out of habit, not necessity?
• Whose growth am I stunting by keeping it on my plate?
Action step:
Pick one thing this week to delegate. Not the grunt work — something that lets a team member grow.
Myth #3: Leaders Must Always Be in Control
This one’s sneaky. It masquerades as “being responsible” or “setting high standards.” But leadership isn’t about control — it’s about influence.
Trying to control every outcome, every conversation, every emotion? That’s a recipe for burnout. The magic happens when you guide with intention and trust people to rise.
Ask yourself:
• Where am I gripping too tightly?
• What would happen if I trusted my team — or myself — a little more?
Action step:
Define what’s truly non-negotiable (your values, your vision) — and loosen your grip on the rest. Communicate expectations, then step back and let people own the how.
Final Thought
Leadership myths stick around because they sound noble — being knowledgeable, hardworking, responsible. But believing them keeps you stuck, stressed, and spinning plates like a circus act.
The truth? Great leaders don’t have all the answers, don’t do it all themselves, and don’t control every outcome.
They ask, trust, and empower.
That’s not letting go — that’s leveling up.
You might also like:
What Does Your Big Fat “But” Look Like?
Lead Yourself and Your Team Out of the Land of Stuck
Through facilitated leadership team retreats, customized training programs, coaching, and keynote presentations with a hint of Cajun flavor, Jennifer Ledet, CSP, provides leaders with tools to help them be more intentional and live and lead by choice, not by chance.
Photo by Castorly
